#BringBackOurGirls!

The #BringBackOurGirls campaign has taken over social media yet many people still don't know what is actually going on, so I'll give you a quick break down.

On the 15th of April 2014 nearly 280 (number varies by report) school girls were kidnapped from the Chibok Government Secondary School in Nigeria by a terrorist group known as Boko Haram. I refuse to give terrorists any kind of coverage so you can Google it if you like but this campaign isn't about them, it's about 280 missing girls and their families.

As people we often tend to turn a blind eye to things that don't occur at our doorstep, forgetting that the reason it doesn't occur there is because of campaigns like this. By tackling issues like this with unity and intolerance we prevent it becoming acceptable and therefore, in the long run, making the world a safer place.

Don't misunderstand me, the world is full of evil and some things simply cannot be prevented however, as the famous saying goes, "You can't stop what happens to you but you can choose how you react to them". I'm not even going to get into the muddy puddle that is Nigerian politics or comment on any of the many conspiracy theories, all I am going to say is that today is the 4th of June and girls are still missing. 

I'm not a huge fan of social media as I feel it has greatly diminished the levels of privacy (yes I have Facebook, Twitter and Instagram! :-P) however, at a time like this I am grateful that I live in an era where civilians can have a say in the way things are dealt with by 'the powers that be'. Without it, this situation and its outcome may have never been as widely reported. As a result of the worldwide coverage that this situation is getting, the Nigerian government has had no choice but to deal with it (I use the term loosely) instead of turning a blind eye or sweeping it under the rug. 

Personally all I care about is the return of those girls. I, like all of you, have females in my family that I hold very dear, I can't imagine what their families have been going through these past few weeks. 

Nigeria, it's been too long! #BringBackOurGirls

http://powerxtra.co.uk/albums/sistas-unite-bringbackourgirls/
UK based female Afrobeats artists collaborate to raise awareness,
supporting the Red Cross & AFUCAR.
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Jumping the Broom

I'm at that age where every Saturday means a wedding or a baby shower. It's a time of closing youthful chapters and opening marital ones which of course results in a celebration for all. However, I have noticed some disturbing tendencies.

The first is that marriage is becoming a trend. I don't know if I'm just a little old fashioned but marriage is a BIG deal! The 'till death do us part' kind of big deal! It's not something you just go into because everyone else is doing it and it certainly isn't something you do just to please those nagging aunties that keep asking you "So when are you getting married?"

I know most of you are reading this and thinking "Well, duh!" but trust me, I have noticed the pressures of this era get to the strongest of couples. The truth is, some people are just not ready to get married and they were happy with that fact until everyone around them started jumping the broom, causing them to feel like there was maybe something wrong with them. Add that to auntie Bola's constant nagging and voila!, you have an engagement announcement from an unsure couple.

The second thing I've noticed is the amount of settling that's occurring. Now you guys know how I feel about settling, as I clearly stated in my previous post Mr. Right, I don't play that! I am hearing a lot of "Well I'm twenty-xxx so I can't be picky, any guy I meet and is ready for marriage is a keeper." Now correct me if I'm wrong but this doesn't sound like a good reason to vow to spend your life with someone.

And last but probably the most common, wedding day dreams with no plans for a marriage. As girls we grow up watching Cinderella, Aurora and Belle in their big gowns swaying to music in a huge ballroom with Prince Charming (or Beast as the case may be lol) and we begin at a very early age to decide how our big day is going to look. With age this dream begins to become more elaborate and expensive (girls requesting Cartier engagement rings with no knowledge of diamonds *side eye*) yet in most cases, no thought is given to the day after the wedding and every subsequent day after that.

According to The Guardian, in early 2013 the average wedding in the UK costs around £20K (This certainly didn't include Indian or African weddings! Lol!). The average couple doesn't have £20K in cash to spend on a single day so they tend to require money from both families and a loan from the bank. You'd think with such a huge financial investment on a single day one would make sure they were sure of the partner they had chosen and that they were ready to make a lifetime commitment that is marriage. Unfortunately the answer is no. 

Many couples pay the £20K and have to move in with their parents because they can't afford an apartment. Others spend way above the £20K and then spend most of their married life paying off that one day that was their wedding. I even know of a couple that decided in their 10th year of marriage to get a divorce and had to decide in court who would end up with the remaining wedding loan!

Too many couples (unfortunately its mainly the female counterpart) have great ideas for their wedding day and none on how to sustain a healthy and happy marriage. Starting a marriage in debts up to your ears surely can't be a good idea. The auntie Preeti or uncle Desmond that pressured you into getting married will come to your wedding, eat your jollof rice/akee and saltfish/chicken curry, leave you a £10 Marks & Spencer voucher and go home. If you end up in divorce they will be the first people to say "I could tell from the wedding day something wasn't right about him/her!"

I love these Nigerian Barbie Wedding pics!♥

Marriage is a beautiful thing and I want to celebrate all those who have found that person they want to share the rest of their lives with and have made the vow of commitment to love and to hold. To those not ready or who haven't found 'the one' yet, take your time, there's no rush. Getting married is not a race or an item on a to-do list, just enjoy life and make the commitment when and if you're ready, with the right person for you.

Live, love, laugh x

HoneyB

Hard work equals results. This is what I felt watching HoneyB's video to her latest single 'Up Down'.

Just over a year ago my cousin Honey (yes that's her government name!) told me she was going to translate her vocal gift into success. A few months later she sent me voice notes of songs she had written. Today I'm viewing her first solo video with a single I had previously heard on a voice note.

Honey has always had an amazing voice (no bias!) but we all know that having talent doesn't necessarily mean success. This is where hard work comes in. Achieving your dream is never easy, it takes time, money, sweat, many disappointments and sleepless nights but, once you put that in you get this, physical proof of your potential and the start of your dream becoming a reality.

HoneyB - Up Down




HoneyB & Wasiu Ayinde - Sempe (Remix)

(HoneyB is the daughter of legendary Fuji musician King Wasiu Ayinde Marshal)

Follow HoneyB on Twitter @iHoneyB and like her FB page 'HoneyB'.

Giuseppe Zanotti

OMG guys this is my first blog post of 2013! This past year I've been pretty bad at blogging, my life has been so busy that I just haven't had the time. My blog is full of half finished posts *sigh*. Anyway...

As you all know by now, I LOVE heels - from their structure to their materials, to their aesthetics, I love it all! - and for a few years now Mr Zanotti has been creating heel genius. Although other designers have also been creating wonders, Zanotti heels just have that va va voom! He merges innovation, sophistication, fun and elegance seamlessly and I really wish he was my friend!

Gold Detailed Elegance

                                                        

             

           
                 

For The Spike Lovers

         

Colour Pop

      

              

My absolute fave!

Signature Gravity Defying Heels 

              



                                                               

I'm sure after these beauties you agree that Giuseppe Zanotti is an absolute heel genius. My dream is that he'll one day use me as a muse to create a shoe named after me. A girl can dream right?

Sexual Chocolate

Everyone at one point or another gets tempted by Sexual Chocolate. Sexual Chocolate is that guy or girl that is so tempting yet, may come with consequences. Like chocolate, you may enjoy the experience but may regret the resulting cavities and/or calories.

We live in a generation where sex 'just happens'. There is no introduction of parents, no courting,  no waiting till marriage, no exchanging of cash (prostitution is a lucrative business!), no discussing the aftermath - it just happens. In some cases this may occur with a stranger but, more often than not, it's with a person you know and this is where the concept of 'friends with benefits' was born.

For those of you who don't know, a friend with benefits is a person you have a friendship with but allow to receive the benefits (usually sexual) of a boyfriend/girlfriend.

It sounds like a great deal, the person is your friend and you trust them so what better person to share your body with right? Wrong. As portrayed in the movie, one or both parties ALWAYS end up 'catching feelings'. This seems like an obvious outcome but to many, finding out they feel a little more than just 'friend love' after embarking on a sexual relationship, comes as a surprise.

You see the problem with Sexual Chocolate (the deal) is that it looks so good! You have this guy/girl that you really like as a person, are comfortable with and trust. You are both single (if you're not it's called cheating! *side eye*) and enjoy each others company but getting into a serious relationship, for whatever reason, isn't an option. However, you both have needs so why not satisfy those needs together?!

This arrangement may work for a while but in most cases it eventually turns sour and you're left dealing with the cavities (consequences). Any of the following is likely to occur:

• One person decides they want an official romantic relationship but the other person doesn't feel the same way
• One person finds a guy/girl they want to embark on a romantic relationship with and therefore wants out of the deal
• The relationship loses its 'no strings attached' edge and becomes complicated
• Both parties decide to make the relationship official but then it doesn't work out

In all these scenarios the overall outcome is the same, they can no longer be just friends (calories).

Not all people end up with cavities and/or calories but they are a very lucky few. Some people just get over it and resume being friends but how do you explain to your new partner that this friend is someone you once had regular sex with? Yeah I didn't think so. 

So is Sexual Chocolate worth losing a good friendship? That's the million dollar question but dayum, chocolate tastes so good... 

Not Rude, Honest ;)

90's Classics

Hey guys! I know it's been a while but life has got me so  busy! I've missed blogging so much so I'm going to make sure I don't take such a long break from it again.

Anyone that knows me knows that I absolutely love 90's music (as in, I'm obsessed!) so I thought I'd share some of my fave songs with ya'll. It wasn't easy but I managed to narrow it down.

I'm going to start with my favorite female artist of all time, Whitney Houston. She inspired me in so many different ways and I was distraught by her death. The 'My Love Is Your Love' album is still one of my favourite albums and the song with that title is definitely a banger. Rest in peace Whitney ♥

My favourite male artist of all time is Mr. Kelly and selecting one of his many 90's hits is practically impossible however I selected 'You Remind Me Of Something' because I don't think it gets the credit it deserves.

I love rap and Tupac is probably the reason. I remember my uncle used to play his music all the time but due to the explicit nature of his lyrics, 'Changes' was the one that got played most frequently around me. Rest in peace Tupac Shakur ♥

In my eyes Brandy could do no wrong in the 90's, between her musical career and starring as 'Moesha' she really was 'Sitting On Top Of The World'! 
♪ I'm just tryna be me, doing what I gotta do... ♪

I won many dance competitions in my youth because of this song, the beat always got me going. The message always stuck with me, 'Mo Money, Mo Problems'. Rest in peace Notorious B.I.G. ♥

This song inspired me to write one of my earliest blog posts, '♪ I don't get down on the first night! ♫'. Monica gave sound advice while sounding amazing on 'The First Night'.

Hip hop hasn't been the same since Missy Elliott took a break but I'm very pleased to hear that she's on the comeback. 'All N My Grill' will forever be a banger.

We can't discuss the 90's without mentioning the queen of R&B, Ms. Mary J Blige. She has an amazing voice and in 'Real Love' her emotions come through as always.

Arguably one of the best collaborations of all time, Brandy and Monica made history with 'The Boy Is Mine'.

Who would have thought that the hoodlum that rapped 'Hard Knock Life (Ghetto Anthem)' would one day become one of the richest rappers in the world and marry Beyonce?

Donnell Jones has a unique way of delivering R&B 'U Know What's Up?' was no different. Hearing this track always transports me back to simpler days. Rest in peace Lisa 'Left Eye' Lopez ♥

Usher was destined to be a star, even with that terrible stocking on his head you could tell from 'You Make Me Wanna' that his name would go down in R&B history. (Side note: he still hasn't redeemed himself for the unsatisfactory albums I complained about)

Mariah Carey may have become an annoying diva but the girl can sing and 'Always Be My Baby' is a vocal masterpiece.

Although he converts his pain into great songs, Joe is forever 2nd best in relationships and promises all sorts to become #1 in 'All The Things (Your Man Won't Do)'.

This is my JAM!!! No explanation need, Keith Sweat 'Twisted'.

I can only imagine what Aaliyah's music would be like if she was still here. 'Back and Forth' has a very authentic 90's sound and is still a party starter. Rest in peace Aaliyah ♥

Despite the evasion of taxes, Lauryn Hill is one of the most iconic female artists of all time and 'Everything Is Everything' is one of her many hits.

Last but not least, the undisputed king of pop, Michael Jackson. MJ has hits in every musical era he ever participated in and every song he has ever released has been a jam. I'm pretty sure I've said this before, 'Do You Remember The Time' is one of my favourite MJ tracks and the video is awesome. Rest in peace Michael Jackson ♥

You may have noticed that there were no bands mentioned in this post. This isn't to say that 90's bands didn't produce great music, it was simply because it would make this post helplessly long so I decided to highlight my favourite songs from 90's bands in another post.

While writing this post I realised just how many music icons we've lost in the last decade, it's so sad! I'm just glad they get to live on through their music and through fans like me. May they all rest in perfect peace and may their families be continually comforted. On behalf of me and the rest of the world, thank you for making great music ♥

Heels... Heels... And More Heels!

Viewing Facebook event photo albums is the equivalent of reading a 'Vogue: The Streets' edition of the fashion magazine. The albums show what people consider as current dress up attire, what outfits are being outplayed, what the high street stores are stocking and which celebrities are influencing the fashion in your area/Facebook friend circles.

One thing is very clear in the most recent albums I have viewed: shoes are becoming important. If like me you've appreciated footwear since the beginning of time you may be happy to hear that the rest of the world has finally caught on to the importance of footwear but another thing I have noticed is that many women do not actually understand shoes.

I come from a line of thinking where footwear, both male and female, make the outfit. You could have the nicest dress on but a bad pair of shoes can annihilate all your efforts. Although I have noticed many females have started wearing replicas of  high end designer shoes and taking embarrassingly ankle twisting pictures to prove it, it is clear that although the shoe itself is to die for, the way in which it is being worn may cause the designer to go into early retirement! Poor Mr. Louboutin seems to be getting it the most thanks to the trend set by the Kardashian sisters who by the way, get it right ALL the time.

Is it by force!?

But for the rest of us who truly love and understand shoes, here are some of my faves from the S/S 2012 collections, enjoy!

      

 Gucci Ophelie
T-strap Sandal

                                     

                                   Yves Saint Laurent
                                   Ingenue

 

                   

  

Charlotte Olympia
Leaf Me Alone

Giuseppe Zanotti
Colour Block Sandals

Christian Louboutin
Bollywoody

Christian Louboutin
Asteroid

Giuseppe Zanotti
E26086 001

           

                   Walter Steiger
                Swirl Sandal

Walter Steiger
Prunelle

Christian Louboutin
Summerissima

 

Alexander McQueen

                                           

                                          Giuseppe Zanotti
                                  E20343 003

                              

Iris van Harpen X United Nude
Crystallization

                                   

                                           Iris van Herpen X United Nude
                                    Couture Fang

    

Gianmarco Lorenzi
054