Confessions of a Shopaholic

So I finally watched this movie and it hit so close to home I felt ashamed! Minus the debt collector and the excessive credit card spending, Rebecca's love for shopping is like a self portrait! I wouldn't call myself materialistic since I value so much over material things but I cannot deny that shopping makes me soooo HAPPY!!! *sigh*

I could really relate to the way in which she felt the NEED to shop and the way in which the mannequins were CALLING to her. Using a month's pay cheque on a dress? Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt but didn't have the heart to return it *covers face*

So these are my confessions (pulled an Usher there lol) - hello, my name is NRH and I'm a shopaholic...

OG Niki

As a die hard Lil Kim fan I obviously need to add my two cents on the whole #OGNiki saga. For those of you who haven't heard the hype, a 17 year old girl released a video of herself 'rapping' about her sexual encounters.

Now I love rap, I really do, and it really upsets me when these glory hunters decide that the best way to receive attention is via the rap game. Not only are they assaulting our ears with bad flows and dumb lyrics but they are an insult to the rap industry as a whole. OG Niki is no different.

The girl has a few catchy bars but she is by no means a rapper and all of you fools (yeah I said it!) comparing her to Lil Kim or even Trina are either deaf or stupid. May I also highlight here that although they have both done explicit music they had a cheque to receive at the end of the day and that this girl has no such benefits.

The fact that her sex life is so colourful after just a year of sexual activity (the song says she lost her virginity at 16) is nothing to be paraded, if anything it highlights all the things that are wrong in the world today. Only in 2011 can a girl rap about sleeping with 6 men and state that her mum knows in the same phrase and receive anything but a hot slap! In fact, her mum should receive one too!

If I'm honest I don't even think her lyrics bother me so much, it's been done before, but what annoys me is the hype people have made over her lyrical content knowing full well they take part in such activities themselves, the fact that she proudly boasts that her mum knows showing a disgusting lack of respect and that, to top it all off, the girl can't rap or follow the beat!

Moral of the story - get enough hits on Youtube and any crap can make you a household name, I mean look at Rebecca Black! O_o

Hello, my name is NRH and I'm a bad friend...

This blog is just about to get real personal *deep breath*

I realized I'm a bad friend. Let me explain. I have a huge heart and my loyalty is my gift and my curse. I trust everyone until proven untrustworthy and I forgive very easily. But I have one problem, I easily let people go. There's a line and once it's crossed no amount of history or love can make me take you back into my life.

I recently read a note on FB written by a friend of mine. My friend, let's call her Melody, noted all the things that goes on in friendships and discussed how best friends become enemies over mistakes made by either party. The note showed a deep understanding of the word 'friendship' and her attitude to the relationship left me mesmerized.

I have never really thought deeply about friendships. I've always known I would do anything for a friend but I never considered the possibility that my friend would ever do anything to make me not want to be his/her friend anymore and that only at that point would our friendship ever be really tested. Sure friends argue and have fall outs but I'm talking about breaking the unwritten rules of being a friend: if they slept with your partner would you forgive them? What if they told someone your biggest secret, could you get over it?

And here lies my problem. I live by the 'do unto others as you would like to be done to you' rule and as a result anything that I find heartbreaking I would never do to anyone and therefore refuse to accept it from anyone. The problem with that rule is that it doesn't take two things into consideration: 

1) Everyone is different so even if it doesn't bother you it may bother someone else 

2) All humans make mistakes

The things that would normally break a friendship, i.e. the examples given above, I have always been able to get over quite easily but it's the small things that have been deal breakers for me. One thing I have realized is a HUGE 'never look back' moment for me is the inability to apologize. I'm pretty easy going and very forgiving so a simple 'I'm sorry' soothes my anger. When a person who has wronged me doesn't apologize to me it means 'I don't think it's wrong so I'm going to do it again'! We can't have that now, can we...

The second point is the point Melody highlighted so well in her note. EVERYONE is prone to mistakes and although they may cause you pain, a good friend should be able to overcome that. Now I KNOW that isn't me! I don't do it consciously but I draw a line to what I find acceptable and once anyone crosses that line my feelings towards them automatically switch off, I don't hate them (might as well love them in that case!) but I simply don't care about them anymore. And not in that attitude way either, I'm talking straight non-existent mode!

Melody also highlighted that the mistakes made by friends are deemed intolerable and lead to the end of great friendships but much more is accepted from partners and family members. This point doesn't apply to me as I cut off family and boyfriends just as easily if the line is crossed (it's in the same place for everyone!) but I do have to agree that in most situations that is the case, we accept our family and partners to walk all over us but if a friend, who is supposed to be like family might I add!, does the same, they get the axe. So yeah, Melody's note really got me thinking and something another friend said came to mind:

"My love is conditional and has fine print so when I say 'I love you' it's more like 'I love you*'"

As I said at the beginning of this post I have a big heart and when I love I do so passionately and freely. Maybe that is why when the ultimate line is crossed my heart can't find a way to continue dealing with that person, whether it be in love or hate, so it just erases them from my present and future. Don't get me wrong I forgive and forget but at the same time I cannot trust them to cherish me the way I cherish them so my only solution is to let them go. I know it's not right but I am under construction and I hope that with time I can learn the art of reconciliation after the storm.

So once again, my name is NRH and I'm a bad friend...

Moment For Life

I was a die hard Usher fan until he came out with his last two albums which frankly were just disappointing. I guess I began to expect nothing but fantastic albums from him (can somebody say '8701'!) so when 'Here I Stand' came out I was devastated at the atrocity he'd had the cheek to release! I thought "Ok, he was going through a phase, give the guy a chance" and put my hopes up for 'Raymond vs Raymond' but once again I was bitterly disappointed (sad times). 

So although I no longer have any great album expectations from him, nobody can deny he is a hell of a performer and I really wanted to go to his concert. Unfortunately I didn't get a chance so I did the next best thing - Youtube'd it! Ok so maybe it wasn't the next best but somewhere on that list of alternative options!

ANYWAY I came across this video, it took me a few seconds to realise she was a fan from the audience and I couldn't help wondering if this girl had been practising for this very moment all her life...

What do you think?