Saturday, February 11, 2012

Why Did I Get Married?

The world has been buzzing with the news that basketballer Kobe Bryant's divorce from Vanessa Bryan cost him an estimated $150 million.


Many people felt this was an unfair settlement and some, like sissy rapper Drake, made their opinion known.  Within his verse on Rick Ross' 'Stay Schemin' track Drake states "Kobe about to lose a hundred fifty M's, Kobe my n***a I hated it had to be him. B***h you wasn't with me shooting in the gym". On the other hand, many females flooded Twitter with indignation stating that although Vanessa wasn't with Kobe 'shooting in the gym', she was at home holding down the fort, cooking his meals, washing his clothes and looking after his children.

                
                    B***h you wasn't with me shooting in the gym
That's coz I was at home cooking, cleaning
& looking after yo kids!
Outrageous divorce settlements are more or less the norm in the world of celebrities but as per usual the question is: Is the person who doesn't directly earn the money entitled to leave the marriage with half (sometimes more!) of what their spouse has earned?

The financial losses associated with divorce have caused people to opt for prenuptial agreements but many people feel that a pre-nup is a sign that the person requesting it doesn't believe the marriage will last or that there is a financial motive to the nuptials. Personally I don't have anything against pre-nups, I feel they are exactly the same as a marriage certificate. 


Before ya'll begin to stone me let me explain. As a Christian I believe marriage between a man and a woman is sacred, there are many passages in the Bible to support this, however, nowhere in the Bible is a marriage certificate mentioned. A marriage certificate is a proof of matrimony and is only really needed in order to divide assets in case of divorce or death of a spouse. So how does this differ from a pre-nup which also is only valid at the point of divorce? The way I see it, if you have a problem with pre-nups you should also be against marriage certificates as they are both legal documents providing some kind of financial guarantee at the point of divorce.

I've heard many people argue that they want to get married because it is the will of God and my response to them is always the same - get married in your religious establishment but don't sign a marriage certificate! I can only speak for the Bible but I have never heard of any religious book stating the need for a marriage certificate therefore, if you are getting married for religious reasons and the security of leaving the marriage with money being married in the eyes of the law isn't your concern, you should happily avoid signing any contracts. No? I didn't think so! *side eye*
It's not what it looks like honey, we were just planking!

Now, you've signed your life away to a spouse and what you hoped was going to last till death did you part only lasted till the cheating swine your partner got their breath back from their adulterous session, do they owe you half of what they own?

My personal opinion on this matter varies from day to day. Contrary to common belief, in cases where 'marital unfaithfulness' has occured, the Bible does teach that divorce is possible although not advisable.

Matthew 19:9 - I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery. 

Most days I feel like splitting assets down the middle is the fair thing to do and that its part of the risk you take when getting married. On other days I think it depends on how you came into the marriage, after all, all the two become one stuff is from a religious angle not a legal one. I think that whoever keeps the kids for the majority of the time should get the house and they should also get enough money to maintain the life to which they have been accustomed to. I do feel its somewhat unfair that someone who is broke not financially successful upon entering the marriage leaves it a millionaire, I mean come on, even if Vanessa had been working throughout her marriage would she have made $150M? Very unlikely.

My usual standpoint on break ups is, since I didn't set the terms to ya'll getting together, I cannot comment on the terms of your break up. Would I personally ask for or agree to a pre-nup? I'm 70/30 on 'no' for now but who knows!

Live, love and laugh people, that's what life is all about!

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